Believe it or not, there’s something ridiculous going on on the internet right now.  On Facebook, someone started a group called ‘Can this Pickle Get More Fans than Nickelback?’  The group’s concept is pretty self-explanatory: a bunch of people who hate the band Nickelback hoped they could persuade more Facebook users to click the ‘Become a Fan’ button on the ‘Pickle’ Facebook fan page than have clicked the ‘Become a Fan’ button on Nickelback’s official Facebook fan page.  Though I also dislike Nickelback’s music, the existence of this group bothers me.

I have to say that, as far as comedy goes, this was a pretty lame idea.

I used to have a really awful job in which I had to talk to people from all over the country about problems they were having with their cell phones.  While performing call-backs, I noticed a trend: people who lived in rural areas of Oklahoma and Arkansas were far more likely to have Nickelback songs set as “Answer Tones” on their phones.  This is predictable; Nickelback’s music sounds like southern rock, so it stands to reason that their songs would be more popular in southern, rural areas of the United States.

It also stands to reason that rural, southern areas of the United States would have a lower concentration of people who own computers, and thus, there are probably proportionately fewer Facebook users in certain parts of Oklahoma and Arkansas than there are in, says, Portland, OR, a city that I imagine is not very Nickelback friendly.

My point is, creating a Facebook group in order to prove that a large number of computer users dislike Nickelback is kind of like listening to a middle-class, college educated, liberal person talk about how much they hate Nascar.  My reaction is, “Duh!  Of course you wouldn’t be interested in that.  Where is the joke?”

Maybe I’m just bitter.  Though I find Nickelback’s music bland, I don’t find it nearly as screamingly, god-awful unlistenable as the music of, say, Kid Rock.  So, if people are going to go to elaborate lengths to diss a rock artists, their tastes should at least be aligned with my own.

-Warren

In completely un-Model UN form we’ve decided to do a cover song for the show on Sunday (which is at the Parish, I’m sure you’ve gathered.)

We’ve had our issues with cover songs in the past. We’ve tried these in practice:

Sabotage - Beastie Boys; Tell Me Lies - Fleetwood Mac; The Sweater Song - Weezer (this one went ok as it was improvised but we all felt ill after finishing it)

Then there are the infamous ones we’ve tried live:

Celebrity Skin - Hole (worked in practice but I believe there were some equipment issues and the fact that it was a Hole song that ruined it)

Then there was the Green Day-Oasis mashup from the show that is never to be mentioned around a band member. We played this Brain Stew-Champagne Supernova mashup that went really well in practice and then nearly broke up the band at it’s pitiful performance live. Luckily for the band there were two (2) people at this show and they were both girlfriends. May we never speak of it again.

So the cover song we’re playing on Sunday?

It’s called ”Mandarino” and it’s by Jesus Sweat. It goes a little something like this:

My mustache has a name/My mustache has a name/My mustache has a name/Mandarino

(repeat chorus)

Don’t be scared/don’t be scared/it tickles (uh huh!)/it tickles (oh yeah?!)/Don’t be scared/don’t be scared/it tickles (uh huh!)/it tickles (oh yeah?!)

(repeat chorus)

Boys stand up, girls sit down(uh huh! uh huh!)/Boys stand up, girls sit down(uh huh! uh huh!)

I have a Dan Marino rookie card, jealous? Jealous?/I have a Dan Marino rookie card, jealous? Jealous?

(repeat chorus)

Awesome, right? SEE YOU ON SUNDAY!

-Jeff

When people talk about the bands they liked when they were in middle school, I like to pretend that my ninth grade self had really good taste in music.  Essentially, this perception of myself is based on a single fact: I never owned a Limp Bizkit album, and Limp Bizkit are probably the number one band that people born in the first half of the 80’s are embarrassed for having liked in middle school.

Recently, I’ve been using a website called GrooveShark to stream all kinds of music that I haven’t listened to in years.  As I comb the archives of my brain, I find that, despite having dodged the Limp Bizkit bullet, I did in fact listen to all kinds of music in late middle school and early high school that most people would find questionable.

For instance, everyone I know seems to hate the band Phish.  Conveniently, I seemed to have forgotten over the years that I used to listen to A Live One all the time.

I pulled up A Live One on GrooveShark the other day, secretly hoping that I could chalk my Phish phandom up to youthful indiscretion.  Unfortunately, this has not proven to be the case.  A Live One still sounds great to me.  The fact that I like Phish seems strange to, because I normally don’t enjoy long-winded “jam band” type music.  Still, I can’t help but think that Phish are the Miles Davis of the hacky-sack/Bonnaroo bands; just as most people who don’t listen to jazz might still like Miles Davis’s Kind of Blue, tons of people who claim they despise jam bands might still like A Live One.  When you get down to it, Phish took classic rock to its logical, bombastic conclusion, and they did it with an infectious sense of humor.

The ending of “Stash” is really great.   When the crazy guitar and samba piano snap back into the groove and that chorus of “maybe so / maybe not” comes back in?  Really good stuff.

This just goes to show that, when you are really honest with yourself, your taste in music will never make any sense, ever.

-Warren

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXHwIrEpeSQ

Editor’s Note:  This update was absolutely, unquestionably posted by Alex Tanton.

Today is a magical day. Today is the 4th Annual Beard and Mustache competition at the Mohawk. It is hosted by our friends at Misprint magazine. Please come join the Model UN in the reverie!

I’m sure we will tell you about our show at the Parish on Feb. 28th. Many times. Over and over.

-Jeff

The reason I put a picture of Heart here (besides the fact that HEART IS AWESOME and my dad had 8-track cassettes of them that we would jam in his Corvette) is that I’ve had the song “These Dreams” stuck in my head.

That, and I’ve been thinking a lot about dreams recently. Besides the typical dreams of being in this movie http://www.theroommovie.com (“YOU’RE TEARING ME APART, LISA!”) and of ex-girlfriends (d’oh!) I have dreams about playing shows.

There are two types of dreams. The best ones, of course, are ones of actually playing. Somehow the songs are either completely new to me and for some reason I am able to play along and it sounds FREAKING GREAT. I’ve had dreams about playing extended or rearranged versions of Model UN songs as well as playing completely new songs that I can’t remember when I wake up.

Then there are the bad dreams. These dreams involve being at the venue but not being able to set up and play. I would say it is akin to having a dream about being a waiter and being in the weeds. We’re trying to get our equipment set up or we are trying to convince the venue/promoter to let us on but there are always reasons we can’t play. I wake up frustrated and unfulfilled.

This has been the story of the band for the last 9 months. However, the bad dream will turn into a good dream on February 28th at the Parish. I hope you’ll come be a part of our good dream.

Sleep well.

-Jeff

Another show announced!

Sunday, February 28th, 9 pm

@ the Parish, Austin TX,

w/ the Authors, One Hundred Flowers

theparishroom.com

Hey Southerners and Southwesterners!  And Travelers!

Model UN will be playing at Trophy’s on March 18th, a day show during Austin’s South by Southwest Music Festival!  This will be our first show in eleven months.  New bass player + lots of new songs.  Very fun.

“South by Southwest week / is the best week.”

Details soon.

(The picture above is a Southern hairy-nosed wombat.)

-Warren

Spoon’s new album is the worst album they have made in years.  I give it an A-.

I used to think that all bands should be as a consistent as Spoon, but clearly, being a consistently great band causes problems.  If you make Girls Can Tell, then you make Kill the Moonlight, then you make Gimme Fiction, then you make Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga, you end up in a strange position: you can put out a very good album that is somehow still disappointing.

The same thing happened to Radiohead.  These days, some people will tell you that Hail to the Thief is a let down, even though no one was saying that at the time it was released.

The Unavoidably Disappointing Follow-up Album Conundrum (henceforth referred to as the UDFAC) works as an interesting argument against the album format in general.  In the era of instant-access technology, a band that opts to let recordings trickle out onto their websites steadily rather than save the tracks for an album release effectively dismantles the anticipation cycle that contributes to the UDFAC.  This idea works in theory; however, Radiohead recently released a single-serving tune through their website (“These Are My Twisted Words”), and the experience was as underwhelming as a gang of Pablo Honey’s at a Hail to the Thief convention debating whether or not “Pop is Dead.”

This subject is too big for one entry.  I’ll get back to this later.

-Warren

Ok, since I’m the only person in the band that cares enough about sports to admit to liking it (maybe Alex is, too) I am going to talk about it, dagnabbit!

According to http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2010/feb/11/big-ten-making-overtures-texas/?sports there are rumors of the University of Texas-Austin (my alma mater) moving to the Big 10.

The motivating factor of course would be $$$ but since I don’t really care about that as much as me yelling “EAT A DICK” at a TV screen when we sack some stupid overrated QB from Oklahoma I am going to look at the competition factor of it.

i’m only going to look at football as other sports don’t matter as much. What? It’s true! Right now there are usually 4 games a year that truly matter in UT Football:

1. Oklahoma

2. A&M

3. Bowl game

4. Random upstart in Big 12 having a good year (pending)

Now, imagine this. UT moves to the Big 10. Games that (might) matter:

1. Michigan

2. Ohio State

3. Penn State

4. Bowl Game

5. Maintain rivalry games with OK and A&M? (i’d hope)

Not to mention the increased visibility in the north and midwest for recruiting purposes I think this could be mutually beneficial. There is absolutely a benefit to the Big 10. I mean, you’re getting one of the biggest schools in the nation thrown into a conference that is struggling to keep it’s head above water.

Of course, this would send the Big 12 into a tailspin that would leave them amongst the Conference USAs and Southland Conferences of the world.

Oh well.

I have a feeling this won’t happen because of governmental involvement but you never know. Something to think about.

I’ll take my -100 indie rock points now.